“I wonder if she’s here.”
“She wouldn’t come back here.”
“This is pointless.”
She ran to her bedroom door, cracked it open, and peered out. Down the staircase she could see a couple of government agents in there black suits. They walked silently through the house with there guns held ready to shoot. Thinking quickly, Teli crept out of the door and while they went into the kitchen and study areas, she flew with out a sound down the hall. She made her way to her parent’s room. As soon as she was safely inside and the door shut without noise. She headed straight to the wardrobe. She climbed inside and shut the door softly.
Hey James :D I love your story so far. But as I read this post I wasn't sure what to think of this sentence...
ReplyDelete" Thinking quickly, Teli crept out of the door and while they went into the kitchen and study areas, she flew with out a sound down the hall."
does she creep out of the room? or the door? and shouldn't it be she crept out of the room while they went into the kitchen and study areas? The whole sentence doesn't make sense. It may just be I'm very unEnlgishfied of a person but yeah. If I'm way wrong please ignore this comment:) Still love the story! :) Thought I'd share my opinion!